February 2012
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madonnugh:
remember when rihanna was mad at satan
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so I wonder what it's like for their kids
Daughter: But Mom I'm too lazy to clean my r-
Katniss: WHEN I WAS YOUR AGE
Katniss: I HAD TO KILL CHILDREN
Katniss: SO I THINK THAT YOU CAN
Daughter: Mom you always pull this speech on-
Katniss: CLEAN YOUR GODDAMN ROOM
Peeta: ALSO
Peeta: YOUR MOM DID IT ALL FOR THE GAMES
Peeta: SOMETIMES I WANT TO CHOKE HER OUT OF NOWHERE
Daughter: Dad why are you even-
Peeta: MY LEG IS GONEEEEEEEEEEEE.
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charcoalmink:
in fifth grade a girl named maggie made my friend vicky cry so at lunch i dumped a container of marinara sauce on maggie’s head and she started crying so then i said “i’m sorry” and walked away and came back with breadsticks and i placed them carefully on her head and i got sent home
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homework: do me
me: chill out slut
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Normal people: Let's go to the concert at 5:00 PM so we're there in time for doors. Who cares about where we stand in the crowd!
Me and my friends: If we get there at 4:00 AM we can be the first people in line even though we have to wait 14 hours until doors open to get let in but at least we can be front row.
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Nicki Minaj style rap #1
gregorgy:
YOU A LITTLE STUPID BITCH. FRONT LAWN. GNOME.
GIMME SOME MOTHA FUCKIN HEAD. DOME.
THIS SHIT WASN’T BUILT IN A DAY. ROME.
I’M REAL ASS SHIT AND YOU STYRA. FOAM.
YOUR INTERNET EXPLORER AND I’M GOOGLE. CHROME.
DAMN, I’M IN THE MOTHERFUCKIN’ HOUSE. HOME.
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stoleatimelordandran asked: hi
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best one direction photogallery?
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Astronomy professor: Please explain the big bang theory.
Me:
Astronomy professor:
Me:
Astronomy professor:
Me:
Astronomy professor:
Me:
Astronomy professor:
Me: Our whole universe was in a hot dense state, then nearly fourteen billion years ago expansion started. Wait... the Earth began to cool, the autotrophs began to drool, Neanderthals developed tools, we built a wall, we built the pyramids!! Math, science, history, unraveling the mysteries, that all started with the big bang! HEY!
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